One of the most difficult things for me to handle through my child hood was to stay out of my stepfather’s way. When I was upstairs in that dark bedroom I had no options, I was trapped. When I was outside it was different, all I had to do was find hiding spots that I could always be aware of where he was and he couldn’t see me. It was not a game of hide and seek, it was a matter of survival. I was the one hiding and he was the one seeking.
These hiding spots weren’t easy to find, I hid in the tall grass on the hill beside our house, and in a bush patch right across the road. But, my favorite hiding spot was up a tree right behind the house. I could climb away up to the top of this tree and just sit in a spot on the branches and have full view of the whole area. If I had ever fallen I am sure I would have died or would have been badly damaged. I never even thought of that. All I cared about was a safe place to hide.
How often, I would be outside and see him coming up the street from the bar and I would head for my hiding spot and climb up and sit perfectly still as he would pace back and forward looking down towards the river bank and towards the tall grass. I would sit terrified that he might spot me and then what would happen? Would he throw rocks at me to make me come down? Would he climb up after me and push me off? I have often thought that if he spotted me and ordered me down I would probably have jump to my death. I found out years later when visiting people who lived in that house at the time, that if he had gone into the bedroom and looked out the window he would have seen me in that tree for sure. I am thoroughly convinced that God did not let him see me, that he protected me all those times I was up that tree.
God is described in Scripture as our Hiding Place, our Refuge and our Shepherd, and I thank God after all those years of terror and loneliness that He was watching out for me and rescued me so often.
That was made evident to me on another occasion in that dark bedroom. He came home in a drunken rage one night and came up to the bedroom and beat on me and then said he was going to kill me. He lifted up the window and hung me out, all I could do was hang on to his shirt sleeves and hope he would quit and bring me in. One of my brothers was right there with him, pleading with him to bring me in, yelling, “Stop it dad, you’re going to kill him.” My mother heard the commotion down stairs and came up and pointed at the back of his head and said these words, “Cyrus, in the name of Jesus bring that boy in and put him down!”
I was looking into his face at that moment and I saw fear and terror all over his face and he put me down and walked out of the room. All I could think of the whole night was, he was afraid, afraid of Jesus and I realized that Jesus spared my life and he cared for me! I have nothing going for me but, the Grace of God and His unmerited favor and I am so grateful for His love and fellowship. It is available for you too in the struggles of your life, just call on the name of Jesus and he will respond to the needs in your life. Put your trust in Him and walk in his ways and you will experience his peace and fellowship.
You can e-mail me at, firstname.lastname@example.org I would be glad to hear from you. MORE TO COME!